Why is life so hard? Why do the people who you love the most, hurt you the most? Why, no matter how hard I try, can some people not love me unconditionally? Why do I continue to let others dictate my feelings?
I have so many Why's right now. Apart from Derek and the kids, my life is spiraling out of control. 2 weeks ago, Derek and I went to my parents to try and "Fix" all of the issues that have been going on. We both talked in a civil manner and expressed our feelings and what was bothering us and asked them both what could we do to move past it all and just love another. It's now being construed and we are villains. My mother is having a breast removed today and I am not welcome to be there. (I wasn't planning on going anyway, right or wrong, I felt it was best me not being there anyway). Not only have I hurt them, my brother is now upset with me.
I am so beat down right now I don't know which way to turn. If you are reading this, please pray for me. I feel like the whole world is against me when I was only trying to heal our family, and heal myself. #Crushed
